Give me strength …

“Dear friend, … No need to panic over alarms or surprises or predictions … because God will be right there with you; he’ll keep you safe and sound.” Proverbs 3: 21,26.

strengthThis morning I stopped by the Volunteer Services Office at Banner Boswell Hospital where I have spent time during the past two years as a spiritual caregiver. It has been over seven months since I walked through the halls of that hospital where Glen had been. While talking to the receptionist, my heart began to race, and I said, “I think I’m having a panic attack.”  Jean said, “Breathe from your toes, Linda, and let it expel out as if you were lifting a hot air balloon.” I did this a couple of times and felt better.

I have felt comfortable with my grieving process the last few months, and yet I know my body and memory are reacting to situations. After having perforated ulcers and stomach surgery in 1992, the first time I went into my office at the law firm, where I had suffered the first stomach blowout, I had an anxiety attack and had to lie down on the floor until my heart quit racing. I thought I was over the trauma.

I have yet to return to solid sleeping patterns since Glen passed away. Being too tired breaks down my ability to fight off anxiety. I’ll continue to breathe deeply and rely on God to keep me safe and sound.

Lord, give me added strength when I am weak. Amen.

About lindagillis

I am a retired church office servant, a writer, speaker for conferences, events, and retreats, and advocate for those who work in the church office. I began writing seriously after winning the 2006 Guideposts Writer's Workshop and being published in "Guideposts" and "Angels on Earth" magazines. I have self-published two book, "The Donut Theory--Meditation and Inspiration for the Church Office" and "Humble Beginnings--Daily Meditation Moments". My other passion is family and traveling to visit family and friends.
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2 Responses to Give me strength …

  1. Bonnie says:

    I have suffered from this for most of my life, but it is generally off and on. I believe stress just piles up, whether you realize it or not…You are starting off right..prayer. You are still healing…I will pray for you. Bonnie

    • lindagillis says:

      Thank you, Bonnie. If the world could become more stress free, wouldn’t it be a kinder place to live. I covet your prayers. God is good. Life is good. I am most blessed. My writing has saved me much grief this year. God has given me a wonderful Christian man to share in my life now and the future looks bright. I hope you tackled the project of your mother’s poems. They are priceless.

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